Sometimes I wonder how often people actually pause to think about what they’re doing. Actually, that’s a lie. I don’t wonder about that at all because I know for a fact that most people don’t.

Take Fiji brand bottled water, for example. It’s bottled in Fiji, loaded onto a big ass boat and shipped here where it sells for more money per liter than gasoline.

They purify and bottle it in a plant that runs on diesel fuel 24 hours a day and it’s estimated that each liter bottled results in 26 liters of contaminated water as a result of the process.

Despite this, I think the sheer stupidity of paying 2+ dollars for a bottle of water that they shipped over the ocean is reason enough not to drink or buy it, particularly if you live next to the largest bodies of fresh drinking water in the entire world. You wouldn’t go out in public wearing a clown wig wrapped in dirty underwear yet, in my mind, you would look just as stupid with a bottle of Fiji water in your hand.

Therefore, I will add Fiji Water drinkers to my shit list, although they’re toward the bottom of the shit list (if you’re on the list, the bottom is where you want to be.)