FDA Urgently Warns Consumers about Health Risks of Potentially Contaminated Olives The U.S. Food and Drug Administration (FDA) is alerting consumers to possible serious health risks from eating olives that may be contaminated with a deadly bacterium, Clostridium botulinum. C. botulinum can cause botulism, a potentially fatal illness. The olives are made by Charlie Brown di Rutigliano & Figli S.r.l, of Bari, Italy and are being recalled by the manufacturer. No illnesses have been reported to date in connection with this recall. (article continues)

Given that bot toxin is one of the most potent toxins in the world and that its initial symptoms may resemble alcohol intoxication; I’m envisioning a particular scenario in which an individual is enjoying dirty martini (that’s a martini with some olive brine instead of vermouth for the sake of all you teetotalers out there) and starting to slur his speech and drool a little.

Bartender: Hey buddy I think you’ve had enough.

Harvey the Heavy Drinker:… *passes out*

Everybody: Oh that Harvey! He’s always been quite the drinker.

*hours pass*

Everybody: Something is starting to stink.

I’m just kidding though. In reality the toxin takes 12 to 36 hours to take effect. Harvey would have rotted in his own bed for a couple days from eating that tainted olive.