I’m surprised I haven’t heard more about Jerry “pigfucker” Falwell and his recent comments on global warming. To summarize, Falwell (who will henceforth be referred to as “pigfucker”) gave a sermon last month that put forth the proposition that global warming is a myth because (of course) the bible states that God keeps the Earth for all mankind to live on and to propose that it could become less hospitable is blasphemy. He also points to the usual anti-global warming argument that we’ve all heard before: (quote from his website which I am not linking to. Use Google if you want to find it.)

Now, I’m certainly not a scientist. But if one looks past the superficial reporting of the mainstream media and examines the many alternative scientific views on global warming, it is apparent that the earth frequently experiences warming and cooling trends. It appears to me — and I have been intently studying this subject — that we are now in a warming trend.

Wait just a minute, Reverand Pigfucker! According to the Bible the Earth is only about 6000 years old! If that’s the case then our recent warming trend becomes MORE statistically significant! Let’s not get ahead of ourselves here. The Bible says that God keeps the Earth for all Mankind. The Bible also says that Adam and Eve were the first humans and that the origin of all the species on Earth can be traced back to Noah in the Old Testiment days. All of this in the span of a couple thousand years!
Please, Reverand Jerry Pigfucker, make up your fucking mind and settle on one insane argument that doesn’t contradict itself.

On the other hand, Pigfucker is simply doing his duty to his congregation. The role of religious leaders is to preach easy answers to terrible crises to keep the people quiet while the men who truly understand the way of things work to solve the problems. The only problem I really have with guys like ol’ Pigfucker is that they pocket plenty of the money that their rabbits hand over. They use this money to foster the spread of hatred and ignorance so that these problems stick around for just long enough for them to become our children’s problem.